God is in This; Showing the Way.

Todays Spiritual Routine Progress:

  • Listen to a Podcast from Laudate.
  • Pray ✔
  • Send thoughts of loving kindness and pray a blessing for 3 people.
  • Read 2 chapters from the Holy Bible.
  • Meditate (currently 10 min.)

My husband and I made a decision over the weekend about which church to try.  We will begin attending church again this Sunday.  On Saturday we will attend that churches fall fair/kick off.  I also plan on signing up for the churches ‘Ladies Retreat’.  I guess I feel good about our decision.  It will be good to get involved in a new Christian community and spend time in fellowship together with others.  I am a bit nervous, but also looking forward to hopefully developing some positive friendships; particularly with other women.  One of the great things about attending a smaller church is that there is lots of opportunity to get involved and serve.  This is one of the reasons I wanted to attend a smaller church.  However, I can tell already that service is a huge expectation here, and I will have to be careful to make sure that I continue on this path of taking care of myself, and setting appropriate boundaries while still finding a place to find joy in service.

Today was interesting.  I remember very little from todays counselling session.  Feels like I spent a large part of the day zoning out.  Something amazing happened however.  Dr.B asked if I had ever heard of a book called ‘Practicing the Presence of God’.  I couldn’t believe my ears, I had just began reading that book on Sunday, and in fact, it was in my shoulder bag sitting beside me at that very moment!  What a surprising moment.  It certainly made me feel like I was on the right track, and that God is in this.  Which is very very good.  Some other stuff was discussed, and I spent a large part of the afternoon looking into it on Google.

I decided this evening to be brave and share a bit about what’s going on at counselling with my DH.  He is not often receptive to hearing about this kind of stuff.  I made sure to give the ultra lite brief account, but I am glad to have shared even just that little bit.  It’s important for me to get DH on board with what I’m doing ’cause he can be rather forceful when it comes to cutting expenses where I am concerned.  I made him promise to not encourage me to stop going to counselling even when I’ve had it and want to pull the plug.  Instead, I’ve instructed him to encourage me to go at least one more time to talk to Dr.B about it, when that happens, and then if I still want to quit, we can let it go.  I don’t want to quit right now. and this time, in fact, things are going splendidly.  However, today I was reminded of my tendency to sometimes make a rash decision over perceived hurts.  And looking at my track record with therapists, I think it is safe to say that no matter how great a fit this seems to be right now, at some point I’m gonna wanna throw in the towel.  I think I need to stick it out this time.

A big emphasis has been made on the importance for me to continue meditation training either formally or informally, so I will continue to list my Spiritual Routine Progress, and try to make more of an effort to practice the meditation component.




Today’s Mood out of 10 with 1 being low:  2-3

Today’s Something New: 

  • Eating Garden Fresh Lettuce and hot sauce on my hamburger helper.

Today’s Social Connection:

  • brief texts with RD
  • messaging with Josh
  • Email from BI
  • messaging with KS
  • Visit with mom

Today’s Lessons to Remember:

  • When a time does come that I want to stop going to counselling I need to go one more time to talk it through instead of making a snap decision.
  • There is intensity, but I am not the intensity.

Today’s Joy Notes: 

  • DD being able to babysit her brother for me while I went to an important appointment.
  • Dr.B fixing me tea when my hands were too shaky to do it myself.
  • Mom brought me 2 pots of flowering mums.
  • Gifts from Mom.
  • DH being receptive to the things I needed to talk to him about.
  • Encouraging email from BI.
  • Setting boundaries for a volunteer commitment and being specific with the organization about what they are.
  • A hot bath.
  • DMac and MMac giving birth to their healthy new baby girl.
  • Money to buy groceries and put gas in the car.
  • The sound of the rain.

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