Todays Spiritual Routine Progress:
- Listen to a Podcast from Laudate. ✔
- Pray ✔
- Send thoughts of loving kindness and pray a blessing for 3 people. ✔
- Read 2 chapters from the Holy Bible. ✔ 1 Corinthians 5 & 6
- Meditate (currently 10 min.) ✔
Today I was disciplined and did my entire spiritual routine in the morning, with intention. The particular podcast that I listen to from Laudate is the Benedictus Moments: daily meditations by Pope Benedict XVI . I don’t know how to keep it linked to todays meditation, however, if you wish you can find it by going to that link and typing in Sep 4, 2014. It was lovely, it was ‘I, but no longer I’ , and was about becoming one with Christ and the body of believers. I found great comfort in it, and the idea that I am not as alone or isolated as I sometimes feel. Last night I read half way through ‘Practicing the Presence of God’ and it was lovely and inspiring, and profound. It called me to a different space of prayer than I have experienced in quite some time, many years in fact. And I found I was able to pray once again in the same way with a renewed sense of closeness to Christ. What a blessing and a privilege to feel that closeness again… to have a spiritual reawakening to the presence of God. I tried to take what I have been learning from the book into my prayers this morning, and found that though not perfect, it was better. My prayers felt more natural and less rehearsed, and with a heart after God’s desires rather than my own. I struggled in prayer today with some body issues, partially prompted by pain and mobility challenges and an attempt to draw closer to God in and through them. I suppose I should not have been surprised then in my bible reading to find God speaking to me through his word though I take this truth out of context.
1 Corinthians 6:19-20
‘Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with you bodies.’
I realize that what exactly this means to me in the context of what I was praying about is likely entirely lost on anyone beside myself without greater detail. But as this blog is for me and I am writing for myself, this is sufficient for me.
That aside, I struggled with todays bible reading. I find Paul’s writing to be so judgmental and full of rules at times. It is hard for me to see Christ in some of his words in these chapters. Someone whom I greatly respect, recently told me however, that the book must be read in its entirety to be fully understood and put in perspective as it is a letter intended to be read in one sitting. They tell me that Paul brackets these harsh judgments with messages of Grace and Love, and without those words for perspective, the intention is a bit lost. Also, they informed me that Paul was a pharisee which I suppose should provide some insight into where he is coming from. Still I found some of Paul’s instructions here harsh in my heart of love and compassion. I was happy to hear God speaking to me through his word even as I took it out of context. Happy to be able to take something of value away.
It had been a long time since I meditated last, and so I felt that todays meditation time went fairly well all things considered. I went into meditation today with the intention of resting in God’s presence while keeping my mind from all racing thought. I continued to focus on the colours behind my closed eyes. Beautiful Sunny yellow with some orange and red today. It seems to me that the colours change depending on how strong or weak my focus is, as well as with mood and of course the type of light around me. I felt aware, yet was able to maintain a mental state clear from thought.
I may write more in a bit, however I have not eaten yet today, and I am SO hungry now that I must go eat. I am afraid I’m still not so good at time management when it comes to taking care of my own needs.
When I come back I need to write a bit about my feelings surrounding my intention to begin attending church this Sunday. The old excuses are starting to resurface already. I hate that I feel like I have to have it all together and be on top of my game in order to go and start off on the right foot.
Today’s Mood out of 10 with 1 being low: 2 – 5 so far 😉
Today’s Something New:
- Coming Soon
Today’s Social Connection:
- brief msg. with JF
Today’s Lessons to Remember:
- Coming Soon
Today’s Joy Notes:
- Coming Soon